Question
Why do people like to sit in cafes drinking coffee, using their computers, rather than just doing that at home?
Answer
Coffee, tea and alcohol in their social guises are best understood as examples of social objects (or more strictly, the central elements of broader rituals that are the social objects). They catalyze social interaction by moderating the intensity of direct interaction (think eye-to-eye contact and staring contests) via displacement. I include as a kind of social interaction, convivial silence among strangers who don't actually want to talk to each other.
The idea of social objects was first proposed by Jyri Ingstrom I believe, and cartoonist Hugh MacLeod took up the theme after that.
Here's a post I wrote about social objects: http://www.ribbonfarm.com/2009/1...
By paying attention to the social object and putting human companions in peripheral vision, you can get much closer to each other without either sex or violence resulting. The greater the level of unfamiliarity among participants, the greater the ritual structure of the proceedings, for a given level of intimacy.
Many other things (coffee table books, conversation objects, knitting) can serve as social objects. What makes beverage-centric rituals particularly good social objects is that they also further ease interaction through stimulation or depression. Stimulation allows you to pour more energy into the interaction. Depression lowers defenses and makes lower-energy interaction more comfortable. Depressants are better at night, stimulants for the daytime.
The liquid form is also minimally disruptive (eating interrupts conversation and requires more paraphernalia... think of liquids as "bite sized" taken to an extreme... there's a reason hors d'oevures are also similarly convenient and piquant (they are often more savory than the rest of the meal...). Smoking is actually even better (tobacco, pot, other smokables), since you can participate more deeply in second-hand smoke.
Many traditional cultures share their social-object beverages and smoking implements. To wipe off spittle or to try and drink without containers touching lips would be considered offensive. These days, we are too worried about hygiene to eat, drink and smoke communally. So modern social objects allow closeness without sex, violence or disease resulting.
On a recent trip to Hawaii, a local friend introduced me to what is possibly the best such social object: the disgusting root called kava:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kava
Chewing this bark is a centerpiece of Polynesian adult male tribal nightlife. Supposedly native Polynesian men sit around chewing kava all night on the beach. You can also drink it as a tea, but the effects are less potent and you kinda have to chug it for maximum effect, which begs the question of creating prolonged companionship. So chewing is the prefered form.
It produces a very subtle and mellow depression, and also has a numbing effect on the mouth. The effects are not harsh or extreme like alcohol or coffee, so you can chew through the night if you like. It is also legal and as far as I know, not harmful.
I liked the effects, and the kind of social catalysis it produced, but the bark-chewing process, even with the numbing effect, was quite nasty, so I gave up after an hour.
For the record, I spend several hours a day working out of cafes. I don't like working from home. Cafes are the Goldilocks spot for me. Offices and coworking spaces are too intimate, with too many familiar people, and homes (in America at least) are basically solitary confinement during working hours.
The idea of social objects was first proposed by Jyri Ingstrom I believe, and cartoonist Hugh MacLeod took up the theme after that.
Here's a post I wrote about social objects: http://www.ribbonfarm.com/2009/1...
By paying attention to the social object and putting human companions in peripheral vision, you can get much closer to each other without either sex or violence resulting. The greater the level of unfamiliarity among participants, the greater the ritual structure of the proceedings, for a given level of intimacy.
Many other things (coffee table books, conversation objects, knitting) can serve as social objects. What makes beverage-centric rituals particularly good social objects is that they also further ease interaction through stimulation or depression. Stimulation allows you to pour more energy into the interaction. Depression lowers defenses and makes lower-energy interaction more comfortable. Depressants are better at night, stimulants for the daytime.
The liquid form is also minimally disruptive (eating interrupts conversation and requires more paraphernalia... think of liquids as "bite sized" taken to an extreme... there's a reason hors d'oevures are also similarly convenient and piquant (they are often more savory than the rest of the meal...). Smoking is actually even better (tobacco, pot, other smokables), since you can participate more deeply in second-hand smoke.
Many traditional cultures share their social-object beverages and smoking implements. To wipe off spittle or to try and drink without containers touching lips would be considered offensive. These days, we are too worried about hygiene to eat, drink and smoke communally. So modern social objects allow closeness without sex, violence or disease resulting.
On a recent trip to Hawaii, a local friend introduced me to what is possibly the best such social object: the disgusting root called kava:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kava
Chewing this bark is a centerpiece of Polynesian adult male tribal nightlife. Supposedly native Polynesian men sit around chewing kava all night on the beach. You can also drink it as a tea, but the effects are less potent and you kinda have to chug it for maximum effect, which begs the question of creating prolonged companionship. So chewing is the prefered form.
It produces a very subtle and mellow depression, and also has a numbing effect on the mouth. The effects are not harsh or extreme like alcohol or coffee, so you can chew through the night if you like. It is also legal and as far as I know, not harmful.
I liked the effects, and the kind of social catalysis it produced, but the bark-chewing process, even with the numbing effect, was quite nasty, so I gave up after an hour.
For the record, I spend several hours a day working out of cafes. I don't like working from home. Cafes are the Goldilocks spot for me. Offices and coworking spaces are too intimate, with too many familiar people, and homes (in America at least) are basically solitary confinement during working hours.